Thursday, September 17, 2009

The Stranger pegs our local colleges

From the Seattle weekly paper The Stranger, always known for its, er, "cheeky" tone:

If you attend the University of Washington, people will think you're dumb, unless you're studying science, in which case people will think you're smart but dorky.

If you're attending the University of Puget Sound, people will assume you're smart, but not smart enough for a fancy East Coast school.

If you're attending Seattle Central Community College, people will assume you have drug and/or achievement issues.

If you're attending Seattle Pacific University, people will assume you're either celibate or a closet case or both.

If you're attending Seattle University, people will think you're relatively intelligent and maybe Catholic but nothing special.

If you're attending Cornish College of the Arts, people who know their local art history will associate you with John Cage and Merce Cunningham. People who don't will think you couldn't—or wouldn't—hack it at a normal college.

If you're attending Pacific Lutheran University, nobody will know what to think of it because nobody's ever met anybody from Pacific Lutheran University. Best to not admit you're from a college at all.

Ow. Read more here, from their "How to be a Person" pullout.